Conflict Resolution
Conflict
There is one key reason to enter into conflict and that is to arrive at a resolution. So, if you avoid conflict, then you also avoid resolution. And the conflict in question usually (though not always) gets worse.
It's pretty clear that if you can identify early on that there is a problem and you are then able to intervene, the resulting outcome will be better than if the issue is left to fester.
Resolving Conflict
Resolving conflict is an absolute must for any Good communication skills toolbox. The following tips will help you practice resolving many forms of conflict.
Agreement
Look for something in what the other person is arguing that you can genuinely agree with. Surprisingly this little ploy will always take the wind out of their sails. Once they have stopped long enough to feel that they have been heard, an opportunity arises for you to say something that they will actually listen to. As you both move on from hearing each other it is less likely that you will be drawn into an insoluble argument. People (this means you too) find it very hard to listen unless they feel they have been heard.
Building Bridges
If you can develop the habit of really listen to the other person you will find they usually give you a lot of information without actually realising how much they are telling you. Building bridges by making the other person an offer can help a great deal, and if you can master the changing your want technique mentioned earlier bridges will practically build themselves.
Using 'I' not 'You'
If you use 'I' statements and not 'You' statements you will avoid the impression of blaming the other person. This can be done quite easily by taking responsibility for how you feel, as opposed to making other people responsible for making things all right for you.
For instance
"You make it seem like everything is hopeless" - BLAME
"When you say that I feel like everything is hopeless" - I FEEL BAD
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